Federal Judge Calls Bullshit on Lawyer-Enriching Settlement

Federal Judge William Alsup basically told Anthropic and class action lawyers to stop trying to ram through this embarrassing settlement that's "nowhere close to done." When a federal judge publicly calls your billion-dollar settlement half-baked, you fucked up.

The Math That Doesn't Add Up

The so-called record $1.5 billion settlement sounds impressive until you do basic arithmetic. With roughly half a million pirated books from LibGen and PiLiMi databases, each author gets approximately three grand. Meanwhile, Anthropic built Claude into a billion-dollar AI assistant using stolen content.

That's like someone stealing your car to start Uber, then offering you gas money. But wait, it gets worse - the real winners? Class action lawyers who'll pocket 30-40% of the settlement while authors get three grand each.

Judge Alsup straight up accused the lawyers of "striking a deal behind the scenes" without giving a shit about actual authors. That's judicial speak for "I smell a rat, and it's wearing a $5,000 suit."

The Authors Guild and Association of American Publishers support the settlement because they're more interested in setting legal precedent than getting authors paid fairly. They'll call any settlement a "victory" if it acknowledges their copyright claims exist.

The Suspiciously Fast Timeline

From July filing to September settlement in two months? That's not justice - that's lawyers rushing to cash out before anyone notices how fucked the terms are. Typical class action settlements take years of fighting. This one got resolved faster than a parking ticket appeal.

Judge Alsup already ruled in June that using legally purchased books for AI training is fair use. The only actionable claims were about the pirated databases. So Anthropic got a legal pass on 90% of their training data and only had to pay for the stolen stuff.

The speed suggests Anthropic wanted this buried before other AI companies face similar lawsuits. Pay now, avoid precedent that makes OpenAI and Google nervous about their own training practices.

Attorneys representing the plaintiff authors, led by Justin Nelson of Susman Godfrey, called the agreement transformative for copyright protection in the AI era. "This landmark settlement far surpasses any other known copyright recovery," Nelson stated. "It sets a precedent requiring AI companies to pay copyright owners."

The Fine Print That Screws Most Authors

Of course there's a catch. Despite Anthropic allegedly ripping off seven million books, the settlement only covers works with ISBN or ASIN numbers registered with the Copyright Office within three months of publication. That bureaucratic bullshit automatically excludes thousands of indie authors who can't afford copyright lawyers.

This registration requirement is designed to keep payouts low. Most self-published authors skip copyright registration because it costs $85 per book and provides minimal benefit. Anthropic gets to claim they're paying for "all affected works" while knowing most authors won't qualify.

If more than 500,000 books somehow make it through the eligibility gauntlet, Anthropic promises to pay $3,000 per additional work. They'll create a "searchable database" so authors can verify their books were pirated - because making victims do detective work to prove they were robbed is apparently standard practice now.

Why Other AI Companies Are Breathing Easy

The Authors Guild is celebrating like they won the lottery, but this settlement is a gift to every other AI company. Anthropic essentially bought a "get out of jail free" card for $1.5 billion, and now OpenAI, Google, and Meta know exactly what copyright violations cost.

The settlement only covers "past claims" through August 25, 2025 - meaning AI companies can keep training on pirated content as long as they budget for eventual lawsuits. It's not a deterrent, it's a business expense.

The real kicker? This settlement actually legitimizes the practice of training on copyrighted content first and paying later. Every AI company now knows they can build billion-dollar products using stolen books, then settle for a fraction of their revenue when caught.

The Author-Publisher Money Fight

Here's where it gets ugly: publishers want their cut too. The settlement creates an "Author-Publisher Working Group" to figure out how to split the money. That's lawyer-speak for "prepare for a years-long clusterfuck over who gets paid what."

Traditional publishing contracts give publishers significant rights to derivative works, which could include AI training. Authors might get their $3,000 check, only to discover their publisher claims half under some obscure contract clause from 1987.

HarperCollins already set a precedent here. Their Microsoft deal pays $5,000 per book split between author and publisher. That means HarperCollins authors get $2,500 each for legitimate licensing deals, while Anthropic's piracy victims get $3,000 for having their work stolen. The math is fucked.

The Destruction Theater No One Mentions

The settlement requires Anthropic to "destroy all pirated book copies" used for training. That's cute, but completely meaningless. Once you've trained Claude on stolen books, deleting the training data is like burning evidence after the crime is solved. The AI already absorbed the information.

Judge Alsup isn't buying Anthropic's bullshit about fair use for pirated content. They can train on legally purchased books all day long - that's established law. But downloading from Library Genesis and PiLiMi? That's straight-up theft, and everyone knows it.

The real precedent here is financial: $1.5 billion is now the going rate for large-scale copyright piracy in AI training. OpenAI is probably doing the math on GPT-6 right now, and Google's lawyers are updating their litigation budgets.

This won't be the last AI copyright settlement - it's the first. And thanks to Anthropic's eagerness to settle, every future case now has a price list.

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