Tesla launched FSD in Australia for $10,700 AUD. That's $7,100 USD for beta software that phantom brakes on bridges and gets confused by construction zones. Australia's basically one giant construction zone - good luck with that.
Tesla's been promising "next year" self-driving since 2014. Australian customers get to pay premium prices for the same beta that's been disappointing American owners for years. The "30-day free trial" is smart marketing - long enough to get hooked, not long enough to experience FSD's worst failures.
Hardware 4 requirement means older Tesla owners are screwed. Your 2019 Model S can't run this because Tesla didn't future-proof their compute platform. Classic planned obsolescence disguised as AI advancement.
Tesla Had to Retrain AI for Left-Side Driving - Turns Out "Intelligence" Isn't That Intelligent
Tesla had to completely retrain their neural networks because Australians drive on the left. Turns out "artificial intelligence" can't figure out that mirrors exist. The AI that works in America freaks out when everything's backwards.
This isn't just flipping camera inputs. The neural networks trained on billions of American miles had to relearn what a proper right turn looks like. Exit ramps are on the opposite side. Roundabouts flow counter-clockwise. Pedestrian crossing patterns are different.
Early reviews say it's "positive" but that's meaningless. Every Tesla FSD review is positive in controlled conditions. Wait until it tries to handle Melbourne's hook turns or gets confused by a kangaroo on the highway.
The Regulatory Reality Check
Tesla's slow international FSD rollout isn't just corporate laziness - different countries have wildly different self-driving car regulations. Australia's been relatively friendly to autonomous vehicle testing, but getting approval for consumer use took years of bureaucratic grinding.
The European Union is still a shitshow of conflicting national regulations. China won't let Tesla's FSD operate there because they don't trust American AI systems (fair enough). And don't even get started on Japan, where the regulatory process moves at the speed of continental drift.
Paying $10K to Beta Test Tesla's Broken Promises
Tesla investors love this because it proves FSD works outside America. But "works" is relative - American FSD still phantom brakes and needs constant babysitting. Australian owners are paying to be guinea pigs in Tesla's data collection experiment.
Your car uploads every trip to Tesla's servers. You're not buying self-driving - you're buying the privilege of training their AI while taking liability for any crashes. Tesla gets the data, you get the lawsuits.
The subscription makes more sense than the lump sum. Tesla's promised robotaxis since 2016, full autonomy since 2017, and feature complete FSD since 2019. Their timeline is consistently wrong by 3-5 years. Don't pay upfront for promises - Tesla's track record is garbage.