Deno Deploy Pissing You Off? Here's What Actually Works Better

Deploy's marketing promised the future of edge computing, but production reality hits different. Yeah, <50ms cold starts are nice when they happen, but what good is speed when your app is limited to 6 regions and crashes at 512MB?

Geographic Coverage is Dogshit

I'm based in Singapore and Deploy's nearest region is in Tokyo. My API calls to Deploy were around 180ms, maybe 200ms on bad days, while Cloudflare Workers from the same location? Maybe 40ms. That's not a rounding error - that's the difference between users staying on your site or bouncing.

African developers get it even worse. One dev I know in Lagos gets 300ms+ latency to Deploy's nearest region. Meanwhile Workers has 300+ edge locations including multiple in Africa. Deploy's limited coverage is a joke for global applications compared to AWS Lambda@Edge, Vercel Edge Functions, or even Netlify Edge Functions.

Node.js Migration Hell

Deploy's "TypeScript-native" sounds great until you try migrating existing Node.js code. Here's what actually breaks:

• fs.readFile() throws "Forbidden API access" - no file system operations
• process.env doesn't exist, gotta use Deno.env.get() everywhere
• CommonJS imports? Fuck that, rewrite everything as ES modules
• Buffer operations fail silently - have fun debugging that in production at 3am
• __dirname is gone, now you need import.meta.resolve() for paths
• Node 18 breaks a bunch of compatibility stuff (learned this the hard way)
• "TypeError: Cannot read properties of undefined" becomes your new best friend

Everyone I know who migrated Node.js apps to Deploy spent weeks rewriting perfectly functional code. The "quick migration" Deno promises is marketing bullshit. Meanwhile platforms like Railway, Fly.io, and Render run Node.js apps without any code changes.

Memory Limits Kill Real Applications

512MB memory limit might sound generous until you hit it. Here's what crashes:

• CSV processing over 100MB? Dead.
• Image resizing for user uploads? Timeout after 50ms.
• JSON parsing large datasets? Memory exceeded error.
• Any crypto operations? Forget about it.

No graceful degradation either. Hit the limit and your isolate dies instantly. Good luck explaining that to users when your app randomly stops working. Compare that to AWS Lambda's 10GB limit, Fly.io's configurable memory, or Railway's 32GB max.

Enterprise Features Are Lacking

If you're building anything for enterprise customers, Deploy's compliance story is weak:

• SOC2 Type 1 only - most enterprise customers want Type 2 compliance
• GDPR compliance exists but data residency options are limited compared to AWS regions or Azure geographies
• 99.95% SLA only on Enterprise tier (AWS gives you this on standard plans)
• Audit logging is basic compared to CloudTrail or Azure Monitor
• SSO works but feels like an afterthought compared to Auth0 or Okta integration

Bandwidth Costs Hurt

Deploy's $0.50/GB bandwidth above free tier limits adds up fast. Traffic spike? Hope you like surprise bills.

Had one project go viral on Reddit - bandwidth overage was around $100 that month, maybe a bit more. Same traffic on Cloudflare Workers? Included. On Railway? Also included.

The alternatives exist because Deploy's limitations are real, not theoretical. Here's what actually works when Deploy doesn't.

Tried most of the major serverless platforms when Deploy kept shitting the bed.

Here's what actually worked in production, not theoretical marketing benchmarks.

1. Cloudflare Workers

• Global Performance That Doesn't Suck

Best for: Global apps where latency matters

Cloudflare Workers is the most direct Deploy replacement that actually works globally. 300+ edge locations vs Deploy's pathetic 6 means your users get <10ms response times instead of 200ms.

My migration experience: Migrated our API gateway from Deploy to Workers in about a week, maybe 10 days.

The V8 isolate model is nearly identical

• main pain was converting some Deno-specific APIs to Web Standards. But the global performance improvement was worth the hassle.

What actually works well:

• Unlimited bandwidth on all plans (no more surprise bills)
• 300+ locations vs Deploy's 6 joke regions
• $5/month for 10M requests vs $38 on Deploy after overages
• Node.js compatibility layer covers most npm packages

What sucks:

• 128MB memory limit (lower than Deploy's 512MB)
• Need a build step for TypeScript (Deploy's native TS was actually nice)
• Cloudflare-specific APIs have a learning curve

Real numbers: Workers were way faster, maybe 12ms vs 60-something on Deploy.

That's user-noticeable.

2. Supabase Edge Functions

• Zero-Effort Migration

Best for: When you want Deploy's runtime but need a real database

Supabase Edge Functions runs the identical Deno runtime as Deploy.

Migration is literally copy-paste your existing code and it works. The killer feature is built-in PostgreSQL that doesn't suck.

My experience: Moved a Saa

S backend from Deploy + PlanetScale to Supabase Edge Functions in a couple days, maybe three.

No code changes

• just redeployed and swapped database connections. Database queries went from external calls around 120ms down to under 10ms with local Postgres.

What's actually good:

• Same Deno runtime (literally zero code changes)
• Integrated PostgreSQL with sub-10ms query times
• Built-in auth and RLS that actually works
• Real-time subscriptions via WebSockets
• 500K requests/month free (lower than Deploy's 1M but includes database)

What still sucks:

• Only 6 global regions (same shitty coverage as Deploy)
• Vendor lock-in to Supabase ecosystem
• $25/month at scale vs $20 on Deploy

Perfect if: You need full-stack with database, auth, and functions from one provider without the migration hell.

3.

Fly.io

• When You Need Real Computing Power

Best for: Apps that need more than 512MB RAM or actual Node.js

Fly.io runs full Docker containers at the edge instead of V8 isolates.

This means no more bullshit memory limits or runtime restrictions

• just run whatever the fuck you want.

Why I switched: Had a document processing service that kept crashing on Deploy's 512MB limit.

CSV processing would crash around 100MB files, some call stack error I can't remember exactly. Killed our demo

• took us a couple hours to figure out it was the memory limit. On Fly.io, scaled to 2GB RAM and processing actually worked without the memory bullshit.

What's actually powerful:

• Configurable memory from 256MB to 8GB (not Deploy's fixed 512MB joke)
• Full Docker support
• run any runtime, any version, any framework
• Persistent volumes for stateful apps
• 35+ regions with proper auto-scaling
• WebSocket support with persistent connections (Deploy's WebSockets are flaky)

Trade-offs:

• 100-300ms cold starts (slower than Deploy's <50ms isolate magic)
• Docker complexity vs Deploy's "git push to deploy" simplicity
• Need to understand container orchestration basics
• Windows PATH limit will fuck you if you're on Windows dev machine
• fly deploy randomly fails with "ECONNREFUSED 127.0.0.1:4280"
• just retry

Cost reality: $29/month base vs Deploy's $20, but includes way more compute and unlimited bandwidth.

No surprise overage bills.

4. Vercel Edge Functions

• If You're Already on Vercel

Best for: Next.js teams who don't want to manage another platform

Vercel Edge Functions work well if you're already using Vercel for static hosting.

Performance is similar to Deploy for React apps.

Quick migration: Moved API routes from Deploy to Vercel Edge Functions in a couple hours, maybe three.

Same performance, one less platform to manage. Simple enough.

Actually good:

• Integrated deployment with static sites and SSR
• Built-in analytics and A/B testing tools
• Automatic optimization for React apps
• 10+ global regions with intelligent routing
• Native TypeScript support (no build bullshit)

Still sucks:

• Tied to Vercel ecosystem (vendor lock-in hardcore)
• No WebSocket support (major limitation)
• 128MB memory limit (lower than Deploy's 512MB)
• $20 base + overages gets expensive fast

Use case: Teams already on Vercel who want to consolidate platforms and don't need WebSockets.

5.

Railway

• Traditional Servers That Don't Suck

Best for: When you're done with serverless limitations and want real computing

Railway runs traditional Node.js servers with modern deployment.

Perfect when you outgrow serverless constraints and need persistent connections or background jobs.

Why I switched: Real-time chat app kept hitting Deploy's Web

Socket limits.

Railway gave persistent connections, Redis integration, and PostgreSQL. Serverless constraints were holding us back.

What's solid:

• Full Node.js support
• no runtime restrictions or weird APIs
• Integrated databases (Postgre

SQL, Redis, MongoDB)

• Unlimited bandwidth and flat pricing (no surprise bills)
• Persistent connections and background processes
• Git-based deployment with automatic builds

Trade-offs:

• 200-500ms cold starts (traditional server boot times)
• Only 4 regions (fewer than Deploy's 6, but stays warm)
• Need to rethink serverless architecture patterns

Cost win: Often cheaper at scale

• $20/month flat rate with unlimited everything vs Deploy's death by a thousand overage cuts.

Pick Your Poison

Go with Cloudflare Workers if: Global performance matters and you can deal with a build step.

Best Deploy replacement for most use cases.

Choose Supabase Edge Functions if: You want zero migration hassle and need a real database.

Copy-paste your Deploy code and it works.

Use Fly.io if: Deploy's 512MB limit keeps fucking you over.

Need real computing power or Node.js compatibility.

Pick Vercel Edge Functions if: Already using Vercel and want to simplify your stack.

Don't need WebSockets.

Go with Railway if: Done with serverless bullshit entirely. Want traditional servers with modern deployment.

The choice isn't rocket science

• pick what solves your specific Deploy pain points. Global performance? Workers. Memory limits? Fly.io. Easy migration? Supabase. Simple stack? Vercel. Real servers? Railway.

Deploy's limitations are real. These alternatives actually work in production.